Kap & Me

Love, Ms. Piggy (PDA)

Went to another wake a couple of Sundays ago. The Husband of 58 years suddenly had a heart attack, leaving the wife widowed. I hate love stories that have bad, and inevitable, endings. Why can’t we live forever? Or die together? :'(

As I was taking to the wife, she reminisced about the life they had twogether. Yes, TWO-gether, apart from the kids & grandkids. For more than 20 years they were empty-nesters & living on their own doing everything together. And now she’s all alone & clueless as to how she will live without him. I wanted to take her home right there & then. I felt really really bad & hope neither Kap & I will be in that place for a long, long time.

Kap just turned 46 (its my turn next waaaa!) and mortality for us is now a looming, foreseen fact. Which is why I’m always extra loving & extra showy with my feelings. People oftentimes mistake it for PDA (public display of affection) but I really don’t care. If you love someone, and it’s not forbidden, why try to hide it?

Whenever I’m with Kap, I love touching him every second. It’s like memorizing our time together. I like sleeping close beside him on the bed, or holding hands while watching the telly. I like looking into his eyes when we talk & tell stories of our day together. I love leaning on to him whenever I get the chance, or rubbing his face, his arms. Any kind of contact, I crave every minute of every day. it’s called making most of the time you have. And leaving your mark.

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A disorganized mess but still touching & entwined. <3 I have trained him well to search for me & want me even in his sleep. Yes I’m selfish. I don’t want to be easily forgotten. I want him to miss me & look for me when I won’t be around anymore. What about you, are you also leaving your mark? Or are you making it easy for him to forget you?

Life is so fleeting. Why hide your feelings? Who cares if you’re old & gray & flirty? It’s a badge of honor proudly to be displayed. Not everyone gets to a certain age & still loopy in love with their better halves. So I say, SHOUT YOUR LOVE TO THE WORLD. No one lives forever. Wouldn’t you be happy knowing you showed that someone how much you loved him while you are still together? Not when they’re 6 feet under?

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20 Comments

  • Reply candy pino

    Mommy Jane, super relate! It’s like me writing this blog for Jay. We are the same on this in every way.

    In my case, I have trained Jay to kiss me before leaving the bed every morning. I get tantrums upon waking up when I knew he didn’t kiss me. When we are at the mall, I would kiss him on the cheeks when we are at the escalator. He would tell me in a jest “ano tayo teenagers?”. Then, we would laugh.

    We are not blessed with a kid (just yet) but praying fervently and incessantly for that most precious gift. While we wait patiently, we long for each others attention & touch.

    We are blessed for,having partners like Kap and Jay. PTL!

    November 16, 2014 at 12:37 pm
    • Reply sugargospice

      amen! We are indeed blessed to have “trainable” hubbies who love & care for us as we do them! :)

      November 16, 2014 at 12:44 pm
  • Reply kei

    Ms. Jane, this post struck a chord in me. Mark and I have been married for 6 years and I am ashamed to admit it that we somehow lost the touchy-feely stuff in our marriage especially now that we had a baby and since he’s also working abroad at the moment.

    To begin with, he isn’t very expressive and his idea of being romantic and sweet is far different from the norm. I’m the one who used to be touchy-feely and super effort talaga in showing him how much he means to me. Reading your post opened up my eyes that indeed for a marriage to really work, it takes two to tango!

    I guess we both need to reassess and reconfirm what made us fell in love with each other 8 years ago. I am gonna’ start making the effort again to make him feel that he’s my king, even if I’m too busy taking care of the baby and even if he’s miles away.

    Thank you, Ms. Jane for being an inspiration. You truly are indeed heaven sent.

    November 16, 2014 at 1:21 pm
    • Reply sugargospice

      I get what you mean Kei. Even now, the kids get most of my time kaya may laban-laban-bawi-bawi moments ako for my Kap hehe. We need to make time for our partners even when our kids come along kasi in the long run, our kids will grow up and we’ll be left with our spouses. Back to square one so we have to nurture our love & relationship. ;)

      November 16, 2014 at 3:48 pm
  • Reply Noel Q.

    So sweet naman!!! I’m a sucker for these Jane/Kap stories! But sad din about the husband who died. Like you, I hope we can enjoy each other’s company for a long, long time, and I hope, too, that when it’s my time to go that I have also left my mark in The Partner’s life.

    November 16, 2014 at 2:06 pm
    • Reply sugargospice

      I’m sure you have. Magkasing-tamis kaya tayong dalawa.. kaya nga tayo parehong diabetic hahaha!

      November 16, 2014 at 3:46 pm
  • Reply Erika

    Super kilig ako while reading this. Thats why I love you! Ang dami ko natututunan sayo! From being a wife, mother and a friend! Grabe! I love you talaga!

    November 16, 2014 at 4:13 pm
    • Reply sugargospice

      Something that I did right for a change haha! Pati ako tuloy nagdududa na sa sarili ko grabe! Thank you erika mwah! :-*

      November 16, 2014 at 4:56 pm
  • Reply med

    Cheeeeeers for being old, gray and FLIRTY! super LOL ako sa sinabi mo.

    November 16, 2014 at 7:35 pm
    • Reply sugargospice

      Cute parin ba meding kahit na 80 & flirty? Kahit nakapustiso na hahaha! :-*

      November 16, 2014 at 7:39 pm
  • Reply Jing

    Naks! So kiligitty moment! Whenever I see sweet couple with gray hair na naka holding hands sa mall, tuwang-tuwa ako ! Tapos ituturo ko kay hubby, napapatawa din sya. But we rarely see such couple kaya para kaming nakakita ng artista when we spot one hehehe thanks for the advise and reminder,Mommy Jane! The more you made me hope and pray to grow old with hubby, engraving a mark,making the most of our time together.., :*

    November 16, 2014 at 10:58 pm
    • Reply sugargospice

      Thank you Jing! <3 May our lovelives stay true & strong and carry on through the sunset! ;)

      November 17, 2014 at 7:39 am
  • Reply rugrats

    Jane, paano nanligaw si Kap sa yo? kwento naman :)

    November 17, 2014 at 3:57 am
  • Reply Tiffany

    So sweet!

    November 17, 2014 at 1:41 pm
    • Reply sugargospice

      Thank you Tiffany! What a beautiful name. :-*

      November 17, 2014 at 1:59 pm
  • Reply edelweiza

    ” I have trained him well to search for me & want me even in his sleep.” Wagi ka tlaga, Miss Jane!

    I can’t agree more with everything you said here. Dapat talaga show your love and affection wherever and whenever you can. Life is short. Si Edwin mahilig kumiss sakin at humawak ng kamay ko. Ako naman gusto ko lagi nakadikit sa kanya, as in skin-to-skin. Iba yung warmth na galing sa taong mahal mo eh, very comforting. :)

    November 17, 2014 at 2:49 pm
    • Reply sugargospice

      makatang makopa hehehe. Yez, dapat maturuan sila ng mabuti para walang hanky-panky! ;))

      November 17, 2014 at 5:32 pm
  • Reply KassTastrophic

    Mommy Jane, there is a song called “We Might Be Dead By Tomorrow” by SOKO (just don’t watch the music vid, baka maiskandalo ka hehehe). My favorite lines are:

    Let’s love fully and let’s love loud
    Let’s love now ’cause soon enough we’ll die
    Give me all your love now
    ‘Cause for all we know we might be dead by tomorrow…

    November 21, 2014 at 12:26 pm
    • Reply sugargospice

      Thank you Kassie for sharing. Like I always say.. Sharing is caring! :-*

      November 21, 2014 at 11:03 pm

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