My dearest Jena,
Of course, like ate, you also have “14 Significant Things” for your 14th birthday! :) I just had to finish posting all your 14 celebrations so I don’t pre-empt everything, lels. I love you so much, my baby, and I really hope I made your week-long birthday celebration fun & memorable. Out of all the surprises in my life, you are a far cry THE BEST, and I can’t imagine a life without you in it. <3
Here are the 14 Significant Things I want you to keep in mind always as you face life ahead. I hope & pray that I will always be around for you -for as long as you need me at least. But life doesn’t work that way. God giveth, but He also taketh away sooner or later. So I want you to face the world armed & shielded, ready to face any battle with full gear head on. Until then, know that I am here for you, and I will always, ALWAYS, have your back, and you can always ALWAYS, count on mommy! ;)
1.) If you’re not having fun and if it’s not worth your time, don’t do it. Your time is precious. Do things that make you happy.
2.) You are privileged. You are educated, have food to eat, shower with hot water and sleep in a comfortable bed. That’s more than what half the people on this planet have and live with. Plus, you have a mother who loves you more than life itself. Always be grateful. <3
3.) Health, happiness, friends, family, love and art = essentials. Don’t ever think that you can go through life alone. Friendships & people are important in one’s life. Having said that, I also caution you to choose your friends wisely lest they lead you to the wrong path. And remember baby that Misery loves Company. Don’t ever stay in a relationship that makes you feel bad about yourself & people and life in general. Life IS beautiful.
4.) Being a fast learner will get you very far in life -pay attention. Read and write every day -you will be ahead of the crowd. Expand your mind. Try to learn something new everyday.
5.) Always remember that only YOU can make the best decision for yourself. Never allow anybody to influence you & tell you what to do (well, except for me of course. Coz MOTHER KNOWS BEST! :P). Listen to advice, weigh things carefully & considerably. But ultimately, it is YOUR decision. You know yourself best.
6.) True beauty comes from the inside -always look there first. You are beautiful, you are beautiful, you are beautiful… I love you, I love you, I love you. <3
7.) Forgive, forgive, forgive. Pride is a waste of time and rooted in ego. Ego is rooted in fear. But remember.. Once Burned, Twice Shy. Forgive, but never forget! Forgive for your sake so you can move on, but never forget so you don’t let people trample all over you again & again.
8.) No matter what age, there will always be mean, jealous, ignorant, arrogant girls. Ignore them. They are NOT worth your time and tears. You can’t control what others think of you -just be yourself. Not everyone is going to like you -again, just be yourself. Allow for room and space for others to make their mistakes. We’re all human, including you. It’s not your job to make other people happy. Your job is to make YOU happy.
9.) Self love. Self care. Self worth. All of life’s unfoldings stem down to these three things. Treat your body well, it’s the only vehicle you’ve got for the rest of your life. Having said these, never compromise your integrity, baby girl. Never let peer pressure get to you. EVER. Don’t smoke, don’t drink, don’t do drugs, and don’t gamble. And NEVER allow anyone to hurt you physically or emotionally. You are above that and worthy of love & respect.
10.) No prayer request is ever too small or silly to ask for. ;) God always listens to our prayers. Sometimes, He says YES. Sometimes, He says NO. Sometimes, He says WAIT. So we just have to BELIEVE that God works for the good of those who love Him, and for those who are called according to His purpose & glory.
11.) Be nice, sweet and kind. But don’t be afraid to be a bitch when you need to be. Channel mommy. ‘Nuff said. ;)
12.) Wash your face every night before bed. Brush your teeth at least twice a day. No matter how tired you are. Except when zombies are lurking. If so, just use baby wipes -if there’s none, FU_K cleanliness -it’s better to stay inside the room & keep alive! ;P And! Long hair maintenance = find an amazing leave-in conditioner. But if all else fails, embrace bad hair days.
13.) Never go to bed upset or angry. Saying “sorry” first is a strength, not a weakness.
14.) If you’re unsure about something, sit on it until you’re sure. Trust your intuition. Listen to your inner voice. Trust your heart -it never fails. Have faith in yourself. And always remember that I believe in you.
Now that you’re 14. I want you to know that having crushes is normal for young ladies like you. Never hide it from mommy. I will always try to understand you & accept your decisions no matter how wrong I might think they are. I will always respect you. Just one thing though, if he has a girlfriend or wife -walk away. You’ll get over it eventually, I promise. Explore all different types and kinds of boys of your fancy. You’ll get to know more of yourself in reflection to another. When it comes time to make a more informed decision, you’ll have the personal experience to choose with wisdom. And make sure your first kiss is special –wait for the right one, so it will be magical. When you do find your True Love, know that it never dies, it only changes flavor and texture, so never give up.
Like ate’s “19 THINGS”, I have added, subtracted, exaggerated, understated, tweaked, and made some revisions here & there to make this fit just right for you & I. Know that even though some of these aren’t my exact own words, it’s meant as if it came straight from MY heart. <3
For more life lessons, click on http://www.elephantjournal.com/2013/09/more-than-101-lessons-i-will-share-with-my-daughter/